We are very excited to premiere Jefa Status with jefa celebrity stylist and mental health advocate, Claudia Alvarado.

Be the chain breaker of abuse. | Claudia Alvarado | Jefa Status

We are very excited to premiere Jefa Status with jefa celebrity stylist and mental health advocate, Claudia Alvarado.

Posted by Get It Girl on Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Video Transcript


Speaker 1: (00:06)

I’m Lucy Flores, host of Jefa Status where we talk to boss’ Latinas and dig into what makes them tick, what motivates them, what pisses them off, what drives them forward. Basically the how, the what the why. And today I am super excited to talk with Claudia Alvarado who is a recognized celebrity stylist, TV personality, mental health coach and public speaker. She’s currently based in both Los Angeles and Scottsdale, Arizona and she styled A list celebrities on the red carpet and editorials and for the most prestigious fashion houses. She’s also a TV correspondent and a red carpet host and as always the case with our jefas. Claudia also gives back to her community. She is currently working on her PhD to become a psychotherapist and speaks frequently on women empowerment and on fashion speaking panels. Claudia!

Speaker 1: (01:05)

Hi! (So excited to have you here!) I’m excited to be here! especially after that introduction I’m like wow thats me?!

Speaker 1: (01:05)

Like Oh my God, so great. You’re amazing. I was reading all about you and going through your Instagram and I was like, Oh my gosh, it looks so effortless. I legitimately like terrible at fashion. So I want to hear all the tips, all of the, your experiences in that space. Of course want to talk about what you do around mental health because that’s also so important. Absolutely. Clearly talk about, you know, like that Instagram is not reality.

Speaker 1: (01:49)


Speaker 1: (01:51)

So that way I stop judging myself, you know, based on all of these fashionable people that I see on there. Um, but yeah, but before we do all of that, I like to start at the beginning as we already talked about before we started recording. It’s just so important to hear how, especially Latinas, because there’s so few of us, like basically everywhere, right. There’s 29 million of us in this country and yet I feel like we’re just so invisible. Right. You know, and we’re often the only ones in the room. We don’t have as many mentors, like all of that stuff. Right. So tell me from the beginning, like you were born where you are, what, what ethnicity? Like how did it start? Well, um, um,

Speaker 1: (02:34)

I was actually born in Watts. Um, yeah, like, or actually I was raised in Watts, um, until I was three. I was actually born in Torrens. Let me correct that. And then I moved to South gate. And then I moved to paramount and I went to Downey and st Matthias. Um, st Matthias and Downey and that’s, I actually ended up meeting a girl and became friends with her because I loved her fashion and that’s when it was high score. I got introduced to all the name brands, Gucci and all that stuff. Mom and dad were like, we made a mistake with putting her in Catholic school, these girls brand names cause I was like, okay, give me all that. And actually who I looked up to back in the day, um, was actually Paris Hilton cause I wanted to emulate her. It was, and um, and it, I went to college, college UCSP to study sociology because my parents wanted me to be a psychologist. So it was back then already that I wanted to be a psycho therapist. But I graduated and I started partying in LA and I realized, Oh my gosh, there’s actually a field for fashion. And I started, you know, um, hanging out with people who, you know, knew fashion and, and I was like, okay. And Estrella TV was actually the first one who to give me a job as a fashion stylist. And I had no education behind it. You know, it was just, you know, how I could put clothes together from back in the high school days. And then, um, I went to school and stuff for like a week and, um, my parents were really pushing me to like get to go back to grad school and um, no, it didn’t happen. And then I started being an assistant for all of these big celebrity stylists and I got to dress these huge, a list celebrity and I fell into a trap of luxury and glamour and all this stuff. And I then myself was like, I want all of it.

Speaker 1: (04:44)

Right. So, okay. Before we go into that, let’s, uh, let’s go back just a little bit. You and what, what ethnicity are you, are you (I’m Mecxican) you’re Mexican. Okay. Both of your parents are from Mexico.

Speaker 1: (04:58)

My Dad was actually born in Brazil? But he I mean, and this is my first time sharing this. He was sold as a child. Yeah. And moved to Michoacán. Oh my God. Yeah. So he’s had a very rough childhood. And, um, that’s the thing with therapy is he refuses to get therapy for it, you know. So now that I’m studying therapy, I recognize all that OCD, anxiety, depression, rage, and you know, um, it’s something that we all can see. It.

Speaker 1: (05:30)

Was that, was that something that, did you, were you raised knowing that that had happened to your dad?

Speaker 1: (05:36)

Um, my mom would tell us, but they’re a family that it’s like, let’s just not talk about it. We don’t talk about it. Yeah, exactly. And I think, um, a lot of Latino families do that. We’d rather keep, I say we’re a family that comes from trauma and abuse. And, um, I finally to a therapy, uh, I actually went into inpatient and I used to consider myself the black sheep and they told me, don’t consider yourself like, consider yourself the chain breaker because with you, the chain of abuse in the genealogy tree is gonna stop.

Speaker 1: (06:15)

Yup, exactly. So as you were and as you were growing up, kind of, um, recognizing that that was a part of your family history, um, what is it that kept you going on this more positive route, even though it was something that wasn’t necessarily something that your family was used to? Like you said that you got involved in fashion around high school, that you got interested in it, but, and then you ended up getting this opportunity with Estrella TV. But like what does the actual steps look like? Did you, you just realized you liked it and then how did, how was that either supported or not supported by your family given, you know, that they were trying to like probably most immigrant parents, right? Like giving their kid an opportunity for a better life, which is what they wanted for you.

Speaker 1: (07:07)

Well, I think more than anything, I was born into a very humble home. And when I saw like this other side, I mean I was never, I had never seen anything like, you know, like Beverly Hills and I was never taken to that when I was like, it wasn’t until I was 11th grade or 12th grade that I was exposed to that. And I think how, um, through that girlfriend, (Oh, okay) Our friend in high school. And it wasn’t until then that I realized it was a form of rebelling. It was a form of separating from my family and also it was a form of probably elevating my low self esteem that I had back in the day because they had a very low self esteem even through college and some of my adult years. And I felt, well, if I dress in these nice clothes, I’m going to feel better and they knew that. (That’s so real.) Yeah. So, um,

Speaker 1: (08:06)

And so a big process was just you finding confidence, even though it was from external sources at the time. That was the thing that was really helping you. Not only did you like it, but it was also helping you to,

Speaker 1: (08:19)

absolutely. And the reason, the only reason I got that styling job, I mean it was because a friend who was already working there had a high position there and she was the one who got me. And it wasn’t like, Oh my gosh, any day, any person could just be a stylist. No, I knew somebody in the industry and she was like, Oh, she knows she dresses dope. Let’s get her in. And then through school of style in the interning for free was what helped me climb up. And I did learn. It’s not like, Oh it was magic. I did pay my dues and it was like 10 years. Wow. And um,

Speaker 1: (08:53)

So you spent 10 years after you got that first opportunity because another friend, uh, was it uh, a man, a female, Latina? Latina,

Speaker 1: (09:04)

Yeah. Well she was working for LBA media and she was like, let me hook you up with, cause I told her I want to style and she told me, you know what, let me get you in. And then I proceeded to go into school style those interns and I started getting my own clients and it built up from there. And that’s how I did that. And then, then that’s when the more I climbed and the more like friends I got, I guess you would say the more parties and events I did, like the real parties, then that’s when I started seeing there’s something going on here. And it started affecting me negatively. And um, that’s when I decided, um, I can’t do this anymore. This is kind of toxic. And I’m not saying all fashion is like that. I’m not saying all entertainment is like that, but you have to choose what’s right for you. And that’s when I took the other end and said, I’m not doing this anymore. I’m going to just make sure that I choose projects that are positive and choose to be around people that are positive and going back to school and getting my psychology degree.

Speaker 1: (10:11)

At what point do you start to realize that all of that external stuff, the parties and the fashion and all of these things are not in line with how you’re actually feeling about yourself?

Speaker 1: (10:24)

Well, I mean, this was even before Instagram was made, um, or the beginnings of Instagram. I was, I, um, ended up having a shopping addiction. I was comparing myself to the models all the time to the actresses and I started, um, starving myself. I had a full blown eating disorder. Um, I was depressed. I know I was depressed. Um, I would party all the time. Um, each, I would contact people to let me know where the party was at. Um, I was being reckless and, um, even, and I was starting, I would see people being told things that were wrong or seeing abuse, emotional abuse, even sexual abuse. And I wouldn’t do anything about it. And for me to see that and not do anything that would take something to, um, take like, um, it would trigger me. And when the trigger happened, instead of, um, self-soothing it, I would self-destruct more. I would go drink and numb myself. So it was getting really bad to the point where, um, I didn’t know how to articulate those emotions. Instead I would lash out at my friends, at my family or I would sleep too much to escape.

Speaker 1: (11:51)

Right and at what point, like did you say, I can’t do this anymore? And how did you go about it? Like how did you, uh, especially as we talked about earlier, right? Like this whole culture, um, of not seeking help of not recognizing that you need help of being constantly in denial. If we just pretend it’s not happening, it doesn’t happen. Right? Like, which just as you mentioned, like just further self-destructs. Right. It just makes you feel even worse about it. It’s like this terrible cycle. So how did you manage to actually get out of it?

Speaker 1: (12:25)

Well, I think I became older. I started partying less. I, I think I did take out of, I never stopped going to therapy. And, but (So you were going to therapy this entire time?) Yes. (When did you start therapy?) Um, like in 2006, not 2010. 2010, 2012. So it’s been a while. Yeah. And um, and I just started, um, probably it was one of, um, it was like in December of maybe 2014, 2015 that I was just like, I can’t do this anymore. Like I can’t see this anymore. I can’t be surrounded with so much toxic ne or I, I want to be free to choose projects, choose my things. And I also want to advocate for women because I feel that not everyone has a voice. Cause it took me a lot of work to get my voice right, to be able to say no, to be able to say, cause I got taken advantage of many times, but it took me so much work in therapy, um, for me to grow those, you know, walls and stand up for myself. But I will sing of the 16 year old or the 18 year olds that don’t have it. Um, so I, um, decided to like, no, I’m not going to do this. I need to focus more on therapy. I will always love fashion. I will always love entertainment. But I’m going to choose those projects where for me, I’m giving those girls those voices and knowing that they are worthy of love, of respect, um, is my priority.

Speaker 1: (14:12)

And how did you break the stigma or how did you think about therapy to begin with? Especially given your background, given your family background, um, was like, how did you learn about it? Or like what prompted you to be like, I think this is something that I need to do and then how’d you go about getting it? Because that’s the other thing, you know, it’s like mental health is this, this resource that so many people need that oftentimes it’s not covered by insurance or there’s the stigma around it. I mean, there’s so many barriers to actually accessing the help. Right? So it’s one, it’s recognizing and doing it and then two is how do you actually get it right? Once you realize that you need it. Right. So like what was that process for you?

Speaker 1: (14:59)

Um, I thank God for college and, you know, even those psychology was in my, um, first it wasn’t, wasn’t my major. it was sociology. I just knew that, um, there was something wrong with me and um, cause it wasn’t normal to feel sad all the time. And I have severe anxiety and I’m so glad that they were able to articulate, um, my feelings, you know, because I realized that it wasn’t so much sadness that I felt it was anger. I had so much anger towards so many people and I was like, wait, I thought it was sad. No, and it was anger and that’s something only a professional can tell. So for me, I literally just, um, when I had a job, like, I mean I use the when or when I had my jobs. Like I, um, look one and found one. I just would tell my parents I’m going to therapy. They’re like, okay, go do your thing. I’m the only one who gets therapy. And I still to this day, I’m the only one who gets therapy. And that’s fine with me. Like even like, cause at the end now I feel peace in my heart.

Speaker 1: (16:09)

And it’s about agency like you can control you, you can control your decisions. (Exactly.) Life. And that’s it. You can’t control anything else.

Speaker 1: (16:19)

Exactly. And I feel that right now my mission is, especially for a community, is to, is for, to take away that stigma. Cause I, you can’t tell people I once told somebody and they got offended that I, you know, suggested it because it’s still like, it’s not that you’re crazy that it’ll bring you peace or perhaps, you know, you know, I don’t know, but it’s still such a big stigma and that’s why I put it so out there on my social media because I want that stigma to break.

Speaker 1: (16:52)

Yeah. Well, I mean it’s, it truly is the most perfectly normal thing in the world. (Right.) You know, like, and especially as Latinas, especially because we’re the first ones to break barriers, we feel like we are responsible for so many other people besides ourselves. You know, oftentimes where the heads of households or, um, you know, we have this feeling like this obligation to represent all Latinas. You know, like if we don’t do this well, it’s gonna look bad. It’s gonna reflect, not just poorly on myself, but poorly on like every single Latina out there. You know, like there’s a real sense of pressure related to that, you know, and yet we’re just essentially assumed to just take that burden and be okay with it. Right? Like every last person is just human and we’re fragile in so many different ways, but we can also learn, right, how to adapt and how to become stronger and how to figure out different healthy coping mechanisms, et cetera. So tell me, I do want to get into a little bit of like the fashion world before we move over to, um, to what you’re currently studying and some of your mental health coaching that you’re doing. Um, but what was that like in terms of, um, and you’ve already touched upon it. You said how you started comparing yourself to other actresses and models. You talked about how my set is totally falling away. All right. As we’re talking, so pay no attention. This is weird. This is how we roll. We just keep going. But you, you know, Paris Hilton was like a mentor, which is so random, but (I know, I know.) She looks nothing like you or me (Exactly, exactly.) But at same time there was probably no one else who looks like you. Right? Yeah.

Speaker 2: (18:52)

I was exploring the, the um, van Dutch trucker hats, the Ed Hardy, the true religion jeans.

Speaker 1: (19:01)

Right? Yeah. So what was it like to be the only, probably were you the only Latina, would you say? Oftentimes in the room?

Speaker 2: (19:07)

Yeah. Yeah, I would because we would go to West Hollywood. Um, cause that friend was, she had, she was wealthy and you know, so she would like would borrow her sister’s clothes. We would go down in Gucci and all that stuff. And I mean I remember the, the thing is, is that those clothes made me feel like a better person. And I think that goes back to Instagram, you know, like so deep. Exactly. It, it’s like they, I think what that it’s Instagram is selling a lifestyle, I believe. Absolutely. It’s almost like as influencers, it’s almost to make them feel like not, I don’t, I don’t want to say, but like, okay, like this is a lifestyle I want. I want to be her. Look at her. She’s on, she’s at this Island. When look at how beautiful she looks and look at how perfect she looks and I’m starting, I’m starting a company, a campaign where I want to say you are worthy and it’s not about, to me. I’m so happy that I have these sponsors that I have right now that know my size like that know my size. They know what I look like. They send the sizes and you don’t have to because with this epidemic of like girls starving themselves, it’s not good. They’re going to sponsor you. I have ’em for example, one of my new sponsors revolve that, you know, they’re very known to have very beautiful Tom model, but you know, they’re sponsoring me. Them not, I’m not a size two. And you know, they’re, they’re, they’re becoming very inclusive. You know, I’m like, they were very happy to send me, you know, my size and you know, sponsor me aloe yoga too. They’re refined with, you know, sending me and I’m like, I can’t do a yoga pose. But you know, they sent me, you know, a warrior set, you know, because it’s not I, and I want to make sure that women know that you don’t have to be a size two. You don’t have to starve with yourself. If you want to be an influencer, embrace the body you’re in, and you can make it your worthy just as you are. And I think that that’s what we have to promote on social media. Don’t try to, just because you don’t look like one of these girls doesn’t mean you won’t make it as an influencer.

Speaker 1: (21:28)

But let’s also recognize that that’s hard, right? Because you know, you’ve been in therapy now for years, right. Um, I think for me, my process of developing my self confidence also happened after years and years and years of like self realization and like being broken down and having to deal with all these barriers and you know, dealing with white supremacy and colonization and, you know, like this, uh, ideal, this beauty standard in this beauty ideal that is entirely rooted in the white culture. Right? And, but you don’t just like wake up one day and you’re like, yeah, I’m, I’m perfectly happy with the way that I look, right. So I, it sounds to me like you went from using fashion as something to make you feel better to validate yourself but then ended up moving to a place where now you use fashion to empower yourself and empower others. So yeah. How did that happen?

Speaker 2: (22:40)

So honestly it was a lot of hard work. It was literally it honestly. And to this day I still do it. So you do have, for me personally, it’s therapy. It’s getting rid of all those wiring patterns. Hearing other people tell you, even unconsciously hearing your mama say Como estas gordita? Or hearing your or hearing your bullies tell you you’re fat, you’re ugly. And most importantly, it’s your own self taught with body dysmorphia. You get, I’m fat, I’m ugly, I look disgusting. And rewiring those thoughts too. I’m beautiful. I’m happy you have to do your affirmations even though you think a little deck of cards, or those posted on your notes? If you do those every day, they do work. It is possible to rewire your brain, but all of those 30 years of that negative self talk is going to take, it’s not going to be instant. You’re absolutely right. It’s going to take a time, but it’s up to you and only you can do the work. So you have to get started with telling yourself how beautiful you are and even if you don’t believe it in like a week, wait six months and see the change that there’s going to be when you look in the mirror and you don’t actually start seeing yourself like yeah, just, it’s really crazy how much you can change

Speaker 1: (24:08)

and you know, it is interesting because you know, I, I joke that I’m really terrible at fashion and actually I kind of am, but I don’t really care at the same time. Right. Like I do try to learn and like I actually go to Pinterest all the time. Pinterest is like my thing. I will literally search like tucked in t-shirt. Yeah. tucked in t-shirt outfit and literally look at all of the examples of how other people are doing it and then I’ll be like, Oh, okay, that seems easy, but I have like zero creativity when it comes to fashion, you know? But it’s so like I joke that I’m not good at it, but at the same time I’m also, I’m super confident in like whatever it is that I choose to wear, you know what I mean? So I think like for me there’s a difference between saying and recognizing I could be better and, and I need help. Yeah. And there’s a difference between saying that, but then also being very secure and confident about the way that I look every single day. And if it doesn’t happen to be the most fashionable Instagramable outfit, I’m cool with that too. You know what I mean? So it’s like, it’s more about just like being fully confident, but also recognizing that if you want to do better or if you want to learn new tricks or if you want to, um, look like the latest fashion, whatever, that’s cool too. But that’s not the thing that is driving you. That’s not where you get your confidence from because you can have confidence whether you’re wearing a burlap bag or wearing, you know, the latest and cutest outfit that Claudia Alvarado put together for you.

Speaker 2: (25:47)

No, and yeah, and more importantly than being confident is being happy because I know for a fact that there’s like a thought, like you see this most, the most perfectly curated Instagram and she’s wearing like the most high end clothing. And I can tell you, and I’m not going to say this person for a fact, she’s the most depressed, most unhappy person. It’s about being happy. That’s, that’s your goal right there. It’s about feeling happy, being at peace, being being and feeling worthy and feeling worthy. You know, I think that’s the end goal. Whatever you’re wearing, because at the end, at the end, that’s not what’s going to matter. If you’re happy, if you’re confident, if you’re at peace, you’re going to be wearing something from say like that costs $7 and you’re going to be feeling like you’re on the moon.

Speaker 1: (26:40)

Yeah. Well that’s totally been me like an all of my shows. When I decided to do this show with LA TV, I literally went to the callejones to the LA alleys and I just bought like a bunch of tops that were super cute and they were all like, you know, $10 and I’m like, yep, looks good to me, you know? But like I don’t care if people know. In fact, I posted it. Right. Yeah. I was like, I don’t care if people know that I shop at the callejone , you know? Because like they have cute stuff and also I’m not going to spend like, you know, whatever ridiculous amount of money on a top that I’m literally going to wear once, because that’s the other way that media works. Like if you, you can’t wear the same thing more than a handful of times, you know? So it’s like, yeah, like I, I’m like, you totally would’ve been proud of me at the calljones. Like “That’s a cute top seven bucks. Yes. I’ll take it.”

Speaker 2: (27:29)

Yeah, no, and that’s what it’s all about, really truly. It’s like you have to prioritize what it’s really about because honestly Instagram is, it really is fake, you know, really it’s fake. It, I’ll tell you, just even one of my, there’s a shot of me, it’s an older picture where I met the Grammy’s, I’m wearing a blue or valet Shay. And that night I went home and I literally was super depressed because, um, my abuelita was about to die and like you see me, they’re all super happy. I wanted to just rip it. I actually ripped that dress that same night because my abuelita passed away. So you never know. You just never know. So don’t aim for that, you know, don’t aim for those, you know, substantive. Something’s hurting you. Like I said, I had a shopping addiction and I kept trying to like get a hole in, like fill a hole inside me, you know? And in the end, once I realized what I was angry about and, and that anger was taken away and it took a long time, I, I don’t feel like I need clothes anymore, you know?

Speaker 1: (28:42)

And so now as now, fast forward as probably still being the only Latino in the room, how is your experience different now than it was five and 10 years ago? Like how now that you’re focused on so many different other things and your confidence is now coming from somewhere internal as opposed to external? Like how do you feel, um, like in terms of your identity and uh, feeling like, you know, maybe you don’t have all of that pressure to quote unquote conform and look like the rest of these people?

Speaker 2: (29:19)

I feel free, I feel free that I don’t know how I can be myself. I feel that I don’t, I’m not, I don’t have to constantly, constantly be checking my phone 24, seven. I feel that I am beautiful in my own way. I feel there is enough for everyone else. I feel like I don’t have to constantly be guarding my own stuff. Like I can share with everyone else because in the end what God has for me is for me. So you know, like God has enough for everyone else. And finally, it’s like, there’s like this have very healthy sense of love with me, love with me, and I can like finally love without needing to be loved back. I can love freely. So,

Speaker 1: (30:16)

and it wasn’t, I mean, could you imagine if every single person in listening to this or watching this was able to feel that way? Like how liberating would that be for so many of us to just be like, you know what, yes girl, that shit. Like I’m good enough as I am and I will do what I want and let like that’s it. You can choose whatever you want. You can choose the fashion, choose to pursue your, your higher ed, uh, graduate degree, choose to change careers, which I do want to talk to you about. We have a couple minutes left but I really want to get into that. Um, but yeah, like how amazing. Like I can just, I can feel your sense of just liberation and just, it’s amazing. It’s just, it’s so amazing. I wish that every last Latina, every last woman out there could eventually get to that place. You know?

Speaker 2: (31:13)

I hope so too. Cause it can be suffocating. It can be scary. It can be like constantly like checking, checking on it, checking on it or checking people’s stuff or obsessing over one thing or another and it’s exhausting

Speaker 1: (31:28)

And they’re needing that validation from social media.

Speaker 2: (31:31)

Yeah. It’s exhausting. And I mean once you’re done you can focus on giving back I think. And that’s what it’s all about. That’s what we’re here for.

Speaker 1: (31:38)

Yeah. Because now you’re able to use your platform. I mean you have like close to 700,000. I did check your Instagram, you got really close to 700,000 followers. So, and you said you’re very open about mental health issues and everything that you’re doing. Um, but it’s really, now it’s like it’s about using your platform as opposed to posting something and feeling like you need 5,000 likes on it. Right, right. So when did you end up making the switch then from fashion to pursuing your, um, education and I would say further furthering your education cause you already went to college, um, but deciding that you were going to get your PhD and try to do psychotherapy.

Speaker 2: (32:22)

Well, it was, um, just I was working and there was just, I’m going to be very vague about this, but I was working and I instead of me like partying or having fun with people, I found myself seeing like in like, well that’s fair and this isn’t fair. Well what’s happening? And I was playing by my own rules and being like, well, I’m gonna do tell her this and tell her to speak up about it because it’s not fair. And, and I remember feeling really good about doing the right thing, whether or not, um, it could jeopardize me, you know, so, and in the end I was like, you know what? No, I’m going back to school because, you know, I feel like I can do so much more with this and I, I, I still do fashion on the side. We still do photo shoot. I still love it.

Speaker 1: (33:12)

So if I ever need some help, I can just send you a DM literally instead of Pinterest. Oh my God. I just need to, I just need to call Claudia.

Speaker 2: (33:21)

He can. Yeah, no, yeah. Literally, that’s my, like the number one thing I like to do and I hope and I really can’t wait for it. I really want to do, continue doing conferences, panels, um, hopefully more of YouTube and collaborating more and more with these people that are, you know, so like minded and I believe in like attracts like and I’m really starting to see how many more people that are like-minded are coming my way. So I’m really happy about

Speaker 1: (33:51)

And how far before or, well I should say how long before uh, you finish your, your PhD cause that’s like a long time, right? That’s not something that you do in like two years.

Speaker 2: (34:02)

Barely gonna finish. Um, get my, my license to get my masters. That way I can already start practicing and then I’m going to go for my PhD because I want to start being like a therapist already so I can actually have the title. Um, and then while I’m being a therapist, I’m going to pursue my PHD.

Speaker 1: (34:22)

Okay. I see and um, and like what specifically do you want to focus on? Is there like a specific kind of, okay. What’s the one that you want to trauma?

Speaker 2: (34:32)

Hm. Yeah. Trauma. So, um, there’s a machine sorry, let me get some water. Um, it’s called EMDR. Where it basically brings your, um, traumatic memories and to the front of, to the front part of your brain and, um, you do a couple of sessions, but you know, it really works for like, to like to like, um, lessen your anxiety and like work through those memories because sometimes those memories that are trapped back there are really, you know, picking at you and picking at you at night. And, and it’s like, not until we talk about those memories, you know, we can really sort of release them, you know. And finally, you know,

Speaker 1: (35:24)

are there other types of, um, like self care things that you do or other practices? So you said that you do, um, affirmations every day and you really just like, it’s about rewiring your brand. So like what are some of the other things that either you do or that you recommend for others to do? Who, again, who might not have access to therapy or who can’t do these types of treatments like you just talked about, right? Like what are some of the ways in which people can try to, um, even if it’s just like self-help, but like what are some of the ways.

Speaker 2: (36:01)

I definitely recommend, would recommend taking time, taking like an hour of your definitely meditation in the morning, um, because that, that will lower your, like, even like it’s really good for your heart, but it’s also really good for your brain and it actually helps control like, like the theta and your alpha levels and your brain will start like to like go down and you’ll be able to control them. So like if you’re ever like, um, in like a frantic situation, it’ll help, it’ll help you, you know, like you’ll be able to control like those state and alpha levels. So you like if you meditate, like you’ll be more, um, equipped with those, um, with, with, um, being able to like control your brain. So definitely meditation and also breathing techniques. So though like the floor.

Speaker 1: (36:51)

And the belly breathing and like really deep

Speaker 2: (36:54)

and definitely taking time out of your like, um, day to like read one self-improvement book. I would highly recommend a course in miracles. That book changed my (A course in miracles?) Yeah, that book changed my life. But any book with, um, like manifestation, I truly believe that anyone can do anything. Like literally like if you believe it here, it’s gonna appear in your hand. I really believe that. I never believed that I have a limit. So I believe like literally anything can, is possible for me. So I would say, yeah.

Speaker 1: (37:33)

Yeah. Well, you know, it’s like, uh, we’re running out of time, but I just, it’s like being persistent, right? Because so many of us experienced so many additional obstacles and challenges in life that our white male counterparts or white female counterparts aren’t dealing with. Right? Like racism and anti-immigrant backlash right now there’s like, you know, our reproductive rights are being challenged. Like there’s so much going on and the sexism that we deal with, um, in work and in school and just like so many places. And we oftentimes don’t have that skillset or that confidence to deal with all of those things, you know? And those things are real. Um, so like, how do we encourage people who are legitimately dealing with really hard things and really, and like, you know, even as you shared, you know, family trauma that your family doesn’t want to with that you’re dealing with, you know, how do we, I think like sometimes we say these things and people who are experiencing very real challenges and very real trauma probably say to themselves like, right, like, saying an affirmation every day isn’t going to stop me from being abused isn’t going to stop me from being, you know, like experience and body dysmorphia, like my eating disorder, you know, so many things. So like, how can we encourage those listeners to really, um, take, like what is the first step that they can take, you know, that, that tries to, that puts them in a better place, you know, to really build their self confidence and really believe, truly believe that they can change their lives.

Speaker 1: (39:22)

Right? So honestly like when it comes to those really hard cases and like definitely we know like it’s really hard because like our resources, honestly here especially that we give up, like especially those communities, I don’t think that it’s enough. We don’t give them enough. So what I would recommend to someone who’s going through that, I would definitely say like, um, Google like Google, like, uh, like, like for example like a free lawyer or something like that to help you with the case. And if not like, like who all like a support group or like support groups are so good or like fine, they already have and there are a lot of them out there and they always have like packages to give you support. They’ll to lead, they’ll have like a good leader that knows how to like to send you your like, or to guide you in that movement. Like, like that’s what support groups are there for you. They’re always there to like with flyers and they have like a lawyer or doctor or like child protective services around the area. And that’s what I love about support groups, you know? But as far as that, I think that we should be doing better with, um, you know,

Speaker 1: (40:41)

But it sounds like bottom line is like take a step. (Oh yeah.) Take a step. Like, yeah. So find support somewhere. Like if you were searching, if you truly want to find help, it might be a lot harder for you because we recognize that those resources aren’t as available to our community, but you will be able to find something, you’ll be able to find something or you’ll be able to find someone or you can find a, an influencer. Like I find inspiration from the things that she’s doing or other people are doing. I think that’s really, really smart,

Speaker 2: (41:14)

And to not give up. There’s all this, that support group doesn’t help find someone, find someone else. There’s, Oh, there’s has to be something. And they’ll, they’ll come up, they’ll come across something.

Speaker 1: (41:29)

And as you said, when you search, you will find, yes,) well we have unfortunately run out of time. I know I always run out of time with all of my guests and it sucks. Like we literally just said the other day that we’re just going to change it to a 60 minute format. Clearly this is not enough time. Um, how can people find you your most active? Where on Instagram? On Instagram. Okay. And what’s your Instagram handle?

Speaker 2: (41:53)


Speaker 1: (41:58)

I wanted to hear you say that because I was like, that is such a catchy name. I love it. Extra hot. But like H. A. U. T. E. Like hot, like a tour. I was like, I was not kidding. I am not creative. That’s why I was like, Oh, catchy. Okay. So you can

Speaker 1: (42:18)

find Claudia on extrahaute on Instagram. Um, follow her. Where else do you have anything else going on? Or basically just your Instagram?

Speaker 2: (42:30)

Um, claudiaalvarado.co is my website. (Okay claudiaalvarado.co And I’ll be adding more stuff soon. Yeah.

Speaker 1: (42:35)

Fantastic. Well, we’re looking forward to it. (Thank you so much.) And we definitely want to have you back at some point

Speaker 2: (42:45)

Oh my god yes

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